Roots

Lately I have been having this overwhelming feeling of complete panic. 

It's ridiculous. 

Our lives are finally starting to come back together since our move from Spain.  Mr. has an awesome job, we're building (with the exception of it being in Arizona) our dream home, I'm signed up, ready, and able to go to school full time and finally finish my degree.  Everything is going great.

Then I realized that we are actually setting down roots somewhere.  In Spain it was temporary...and really every place I've lived up until now has been.  And yes, I know that this too could be temporary.  But it's a longer-term temporary.  We'll have a mortgage, we're starting to think more seriously about kids in the near(er...don't get too excited) future, we'll be buying actual adult furniture for a place we know we'll be in for awhile...

Panic.

My heart literally yearns to be back in Europe.  I desperately miss traveling, and I am just now allowing myself to comprehend that we're at the point in our life where trips will be few and far between.

I get it, we were lucky.  Most people my age haven't been to half the places we've been to.  I don't care.  I WANT that.  I've never been more at home than when I was seeing the world with Mr..  It was hard at first to be away from everything that was comfortable to me...family, friends, California in general.  But as time went on it became more comfortable than any of that ever was.  It's like I was finally doing exactly what I'd always wanted to do, and I was where I should be.

I'm excited for Arizona.  It's a change, it's different, and lots of exciting things are in our future there.  I'm excited to get to see my family and friends more regularly and share (in person) life with them.  I'm just terrified that setting down such permanent roots will never give me that same feeling of contentment I had when traveling.

So...I suppose the best way to deal with this is to plan a trip!  Obviously it'll be a while until we can afford and take the time off to take it, but having that plan will give me some sense of a light at the end of the travel-less tunnel. 

And until then I'll work on appreciating what we had and what we now have...because we truly are lucky to lead such an amazing life.  I have so much to be grateful for.

Anyone else planning an amazing trip in the not-so-distant future?